The Glass Is Refillable

There is an old saying relating to how someone perceives events in life.  It is called, "is the glass half full or half empty?"  Therefore, imagine a glass that has water filled to the halfway point.  An optimistic person may say that they have enough water in the glass to enjoy a refreshing drink.  On the contrary, a pessimistic person may suggest that there was only a small amount of water left in the glass and that it is a huge bummer that there may not be enough water to drink in order to feel refreshed.  

One person could look at the glass of water and see that the glass of water is half full.  This would be perceived as an optimistic perspective.  So the life application of this thought pattern is that this particular person sees the challenges of life as being positive.  For example, if this person were to lose their job, they would see this as an opportunity instead of a challenge.  Maybe they would see this as time to spend with their family, a new beginning to look for a new job, and find joy in going back to school or changing their career. 

On the contrary, a person who looks at the same exact glass of water may see the glass as being half empty.  This would be considered a pessimistic perspective and a negative view of a given situation.  Should this person lose their job, they would be devastated, saddened, and upset.  They may not see this as an opportunity but instead as a financial and person burden to themselves and their family.  

Interestingly enough, I recently was talking to my friend about this exact analogy.  Over a yummy cup of coffee, I point blank asked her if me losing my job should be viewed as a glass half empty or glass half full scenario.  She looked at me straight in the eyes and said, "Well, what if I see it differently?  Because to me, the glass is exactly what I need at this time in my life.  Furthermore, the glass is always refillable should you have access to more liquids".  We smiled together and continued along with our conversation.  

Later on that day, I began pondering my perspective on this particular saying and I began contemplating my own reality.  For instance, what liquids do I use to refill my cup?  In my hypothetical world, the liquids could represent hobbies, exercise or music.  I fill my cup with meditation, I spend time with nature, I express my creative side through writing and sometimes I go for a walk.  All these different things add up and help me keep my glass of water exactly what I need for this particular time in my life.  

Maybe, just maybe, the glass is not half full and it certainly is not half empty.  But instead, the glass is always refillable.  Therefore, it is simply what we chose to do within the confines of the glass we are given and how we perceive the way in which we refill it.  Today, I hope you will take a moment and think about where you are in life.  Because your glass is filled to perfection since you are exactly where you need to be in your life at this point in time.  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.

A Cancer Roller Coaster

I personally have a roller coaster of emotions related to cancer.  It has put me on a long journey through the lives of the people I love.  This includes those who have had and who have passed because of this tragic illness.  And it continues to show its ugly face as I grow older.  


When I was 7 years old, my father was diagnosed with prostate cancer.  At the time, the doctors estimated he would live 6 more months.  My father fought through radiation and chemotherapy.  He went to some of the best hospitals in the area for second opinions to get the support that he needed to stay alive.  Beyond the 6 month diagnosis, we were blessed with 15 years of my father going in and out of remission before cancer took his life.  There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about and miss my father.  

When my husband was in college, he lost his mother to breast cancer.  I met him shortly after his mother passed away.  Unfortunately, this means that I never had the opportunity to meet my mother-in-law.  From the deepest parts of my heart, I never knew that I could miss someone so much of whom I never had the opportunity to meet.  

Cancer has had an overwhelming amount of impact on the lives of many people and animals than I love dearly.  My grandfather passed away from lung cancer before my daughters third birthday.  My precious cat, Ninja, died one year ago of bone cancer.  And most recently two of my friends were diagnosed with cancer.  One of those friends had surgery to remove the tumor and they are currently in remission.  My other friend is in the middle of a long, hard battle with breast cancer.

A wise person once told me that cancer knows no limits.  Cancer knows no age, gender, race, skin color, social status nor ethnicity.  It has no mercy for those people it affects, and shows no care to those who love them.  And I know that I am not the only person affected by this horrible disease.  

I believe that what lies in the pain of grief is a love that no boundaries can stop.  Though illness is traumatic and can be tragic, I have seen for myself that love will always find a way to the forefront of grief, pain and suffering.  And in the midst of the life-long battles that my readers may face, including the trials and tribulations that life brings, I hope you know that you are incredibly loved, worthy and cherished.  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.

Life's Teaching Moments

My late Mother-in-Law, Claire, was known for using the saying, "This too shall pass".  Through this saying, she expressed that tough times do not last forever.  Claire knew that when faced with challenges, it was important to not remain captive of the obstacle.  Instead, she explained the importance of moving forward knowing that the rough time will pass and light will shine again.  Claire battled and eventually passed away from breast cancer.   


I know in my heart that rough times will certainly pass by me, but that does not diminish how hard it is to live through what the circumstances may be.  For example, right now I am fighting chronic migraines.  I also battle Long COVID chronic fatigue, brain fog and anxiety.  The Long COVID brain fog can be embarrassing when I repeat myself multiple times, each time saying the same thing I stated just minutes before.  And I still have days of depression as I sort through living with bipolar disorder.  

I was recently with a woman who said, "Everything happens in my life for a reason".  At face value, she was just promoted at her job, her finances were flourishing, she was dating an incredible person and her kids were doing amazing at school.  Yet the rest of her truth is that she lost her job a year ago and re-built her career.  She got a divorce 6 months ago from a person who was abusive and she is now finding romantic love again.  And her son has a debilitating illness yet he is currently in remission.  

As I struggle with finances, manage my health and make sure I am present for my family, I know that tough times will pass me by.  Sometimes my best day is one where I take my daughter to school and then take a long nap.  Other times my best day is sitting at my desk in my small yellow-painted office writing to all of you.  And yet other times, I know that I try my hardest to just get out of bed.  But above all, I know that while my best may look different every day, I will always feel good knowing that I am enough.  


As I fill this post with wise words, I will leave you with one more saying:  "Don't ask why its happening to you. Ask what it's teaching you".  Right now, I do not know why life is taking me down this particular path.  But I do know that I try to remember the wise words of my mother-in-law and not get stuck mentally in the current moment.  Maybe some things in life unfold for a reason beyond my understanding.  And just maybe, I have no clue why life events are happening to me, but I can look around me and find a lesson to be learned during one of life's teaching moments.  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.

Listen To The Small Stuff

If there is one thing I am learning as a parent, it is that I need to listen to my daughter.  Not just hear the words coming out of her mouth, but rather, listen to everything she tells me.  I do my best to always listen to her whether she is telling me a big idea or a small story.  


Someone once said, “sports don’t build character, they reveal character”.  And my daughter plays many sports.  And some of the practices are a 30 minute drive from our house.  I try to make it a point to take the long winding back roads home so that she has time to chat with me about how practice went.  


When we take this long way home, we pass by fields of corn, horse farms and growing produce.  We can watch the sun set and talk about all the colors painted in the sky.  This time together is a safe space for her to talk to me as I drive home, and she can confide in me about the positive and negative details of practice.  I love having this opportunity to listen to her stories.  

One of my biggest parental concerns is that I do not want her to shut me out as she gets older.  I want her to know that Mommy will listen to her concerns, take care of her, and always protect her no matter her age.  Therefore, I will do the best I can to listen now, so that as she gets older, she knows I will always be there for her.  

Even as an adult, I am very close friends with my mom.  She offers me a safe space to confide in her through the challenges that life brings.  And I am blessed to have her as such a prominent part of my life.  

Did your parents create a safe space for you to share with them your stories?  Are you being intentional about collaborating with the young children in your life?  Whether its a friend, niece, nephew, or your own child, I hope you take a moment to reflect on how you take the time to listen to the young inquisitive minds that we have in our lives.  

I love to wear high heels and my daughter likes to wear them too.  So the next time I put them on, I will remember to also put my “listening ears on” and love into every words that she tells me.  Because she matters, and I want her to never have a doubt in her mind that I will always care about every word and every story she shares with me.  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.