The Life I Have Chosen To Create

 

Twenty years ago, my husband and I started dating.  In the midst of our celebration, I was asked, "If you could do it all over again, would you go back twenty years and still choose the same path?  Would you still spend twenty years with this same person?"  While I was certainly taken aback by the blunt questions, my response came without hesitation, "I would change nothing about my decision to date him.  The life we have created together is an honor.  And I am so glad that I get to live it with him by my side".  

If there is one thing that I know about myself, it is that I do not settle.  I have always been a strong-willed, independent person.  From a young age, I took the initiative to learn new things about life.  For any unanswered questions that lingered in my mind, I sought out the answers on my own.  I was never afraid to be myself even through adversity during my days at school.  And I grew up in a supportive family that gave me the freedom to discover life on my own terms. 

Have I been through a lot of unpleasant circumstances throughout my life?  Yes, of course.  But challenges never stopped me from pushing forward and unfolding the life I have chosen to create.  For me, difficulties provide experiences that cause me to persevere even more.  

I have had to push the "restart" button more than once in my life.  I have needed to pause, take a deep breath and reconvene with myself.  More times than I can remember, life has thrown me obstacles that have made me change the course of my desired outcomes.  And yet, I have refused to settle for a life I do not want.  

For me, I am grateful.  I have a husband who loves me fiercely, honestly and genuinely.  I have a daughter who exemplifies strength and resilience.  And I live a life that I was brave enough to create.  

So, to the person who questioned my decisions that I made twenty years ago, I say to you, "While I have had to hit the restart button more than once in my life, I will always be grateful for the one man who has stayed by my side through it all.  Also, I would never want to change the people in my life who have weaved their stories into my own.  And while situations in life may offer me sneakers, I will always choose to slide my feet into my high heels." 

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.

An External Perspective

 

I am quick to be hard on myself and slow to offer myself grace.  I am quick to doubt myself and slow to be confident in my decisions.  I am quick to jump to negativity and slow to lean into positivity.  

Unfortunately, I do not readily allow myself to face the chaos that life tends to throw in my direction.  And I certainly do not offer myself any compassion when life does not go my way.  Rather than going with the flow of life, I try to control everything. 

It is easy for me to get wrapped up in what I am not doing and hard for me to see all the things that I am accomplishing.  Yet, when I recognize these unhealthy patterns, I am able to find hope to work through them.  And therefore, I am more gentle on myself as I relate to my own progress.  

When I look inward and see doubt, I am robbing myself of the hard work that I am actually doing to guide myself and my family through each day.  I am not allowing myself to see the beauty in my life, even through all the commotion.  Instead, I am leaning into all my failures and away from all the progress.  

However, in the midst of these thoughts, I am gently reminded that there just might be someone on the outside looking at my life from a very different perspective.  They see how hard I am working through my challenges, and they are admiring my perseverance.  While I am sometimes suffocating within the confines of my surroundings, someone else is quite possibly looking in on my life wondering how I am successfully doing it all.  

I wear high heels with a purpose since they are a gentle reminder that I am perfect, beautiful and special in my own ways.  When I slide my feet into my special shoes, I move forward with a perspective that a voice inside me feels doubtful but my high heels prove differently.  They show me that I exhibit confidence as I strive to stride gracefully through life.  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.

You Are "One Of One"

My best friend texted me the other day and said, “never forget that you are one of one”.  It was a beautiful reminder that there is only one of each person in this world.  And every single one of us is unique.  We are one of a kind.

When I was growing up, my parents always reminded me how unique I was.  They used to tell me that I was precious and special because there is only one of me.  No one will ever be me nor can they be me.  And no one can ever replace me.  These reminders have stuck with me throughout my life.  

As I live through each stepping stone of my journey, I am reminded that there is only one life to live and only one me to live it.  I am "one of one" in this vast universe.  No one can or will ever take my place.  And because of this, I hold a pertinent place in this world.

My story is an interwoven masterpiece of the people I have met, and the places that I have been.  It is a spectacular array of beauty that I am constantly living through.  And it is important because there is only me to live it.

As you slide your feet into your high heels today, I hope you will remember that there is only one of you, too.  You are unique beyond belief and so very special.  And may this reminder bring your heart joy and your life happiness.  Because this world is so perfect because "one of one" of you is in it, too.  


Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.