Stop Using Inappropriate Apologies

I have personally spent a lot of my life apologizing for situations where I did nothing wrong.  Sometimes the "I am sorry" was the wrong word choice.  Other times the "I apologize" was because I did not wish to create conflict.  However, in both situations I either overused or misused the words.  It has taken me a long time and a lot of un-doing to turn "I'm sorry" into the appropriate use of the terminology.  

I was recently at a restaurant where people passing each other kept apologizing.  Admittedly, it was very busy and there were a lot of people within the confines of a small space.  Yet, most times where someone passed another person, an "I am sorry" flew out of someones mouth and was directed to another person.  My sociology brain began to wonder what word choice could be used instead.  Maybe something as simple as, "excuse me" or "pardon me" could have changed the verbiage of the people passing one another.  And this is when I began to think that the words "I am sorry" are sometimes the wrong word choice.  

For me, I tend to lean away from conflict not because I am shy, but because I would rather create an environment of peace than an atmosphere of resentment.  I realized recently that I apologize for even situations where I did nothing wrong simply to avoid any type of negative response.  If I am criticized, an apology is easily given from me to the other person.  Sometimes I am not even in the wrong yet I try to cultivate calmness within the confines of the conversation.  

Whether right or wrong, good or even bad, I know that I both misuse and overuse apologies.  This is something that I have spent a lot of time becoming aware of and trying desperately to change.  I try to listen to others who blossom in conflicting circumstance without an "I am sorry" but instead with appropriate use of their mature word choices.  I wonder if some of it is confidence in myself and my decisions.  However, I never wonder if high heeled shoes will provide the confidence I need to learn and grow from this change in my daily use of the words "I am sorry".  

Love Note: With all my heart, I genuinely request that due to the content written, please seek the guidance of professional help should you feel you need it.